Like a few of you have mentioned, though my practice is aimed toward women experiencing pregnancy related issues, the reality is 15% of my client's are in fact PPD related. It's a little nerve racking because I don't feel I have a groove. When it comes to The Good Mother, it's still a challenge for me to gauge when I need to be softer in tone and persona and when I need to be more direct and firm.
Though a client may be in a really soft place they may need some counsel of direction and some affirming words of "you will get through this"--maybe they need less or the firm and more of the gentle hand....
Any tips or thoughts you clinicians have on this?
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I think each client and their needs is different. If you have already established a relationship with the client and say something that may be too direct or firm you will get some kind of reaction (may be subtle) from the client letting you know you have gone too far. You could also ask the client if they would find it helpful for you to be softer/more direct or ask specifically what they are needing.
ReplyDeleteHope this is helpful to you.
I've been thinking about how I make this distinction in my practice and I woke up this morning thinking that the two are not mutually exclusive. I am very often the "good mother" while also being an "expert" and guiding women where they need to go. Meaning that I can produce the holding environment while at the same time be directive with the client. An example of this is seen in the mother who is very directive (I have one of these!) and in her direction her love and comfort is felt.
ReplyDeleteAll of this comes after rapport has been built, holding is an excellent way to build rapport in a very short period of time - remember these women feel like they are tumbling about and our holding helps center and ground them, from that rest of the work can proceed.
I also recommend that when you are unsure that you sort it out in supervision. Trust your instincts.
Best of luck.
Great insight KT and Meghan--I think there is an element in there of needing to fake it till I make it (I believe Karen talked with us about this in our trainings...) I'm hoping with more exposure, supervisiona and time there will be a greater place of confidence working with PPD!
ReplyDeleteWe know that depression is a thief of energy, hope and inner resources. When a client is in that state, she may need us to provide what she just cannot muster at that time: an alternative, more positive lens for her to look through, a light at the end of the tunnel, our certainty that she can and will feel better. I have had several clients tell me (after they felt better) that they very much appreciated and felt helped by my maintaining a positive, and even somewhat directive stance for them when they couldn't find their own way. While, of course, keeping that empathic "good mother" present for them as well.
ReplyDeleteI hope that's helpful! Thanks for starting this discussion, Kristin.
Love your perspective marjorie...
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